Jaws

Quietly we sat last night enjoying Mummy-Daughter time, a bottle of milk, a cuddle, stroking of cheek and back of neck as Grace relaxes into the moment before bed. After a while she stretches and decides to stand up on my lap. She wants to do 'bouncy-bouncy', I can see it in her eyes. Sure enough I become a human trampoline, holding her hands as she jumps and jumps, my thighs wobbling embarassingly like a badly made jelly. This carries on for a while, peppered with giggles and shrieks of laughter and pleasure from us both. She's getting tired, but she knows her own mind already... everytime I ask if she wants to go to bed she shakes her head with a vengeance and its clear she has no intention of sleeping for the timebeing.

She bounces some more, Grace does, burning energy and becoming overexcited. She slaps me twice, hard, in quick succession - bam bam, across the chops. Stunned I tell her that's naughty and she mustn't hit. She hits herself on the head instead, bam bam. She looks confused and does it again.

She's overtired now, so I tell her she's going to bed. Shaking her head furiously she begins to wriggle. I kiss her on the forehead and she settles for a moment to hug me. The protest is over, my angel is back.

I dont see it coming. I'm caught up in the moment of serenity, sharing a memory with Grace before she goes off to sleep. Like a dart in my arse, she bites me. HARD. 20 little pearly whites sinking into the flesh in my arm. I cry out and she looks up and smiles. A beautiful smile that says I love you Mummy. The little B hit the matress faster than she could say JAWS.

I'm calling Super Nanny.