Friday, 8 July 2011

You know you're a Mum when...

When you find teary faces like this CUTE.

And when you find your hand stuck in the bottom of a box of mini-weetabix that's in the door pocket as you take a corner at the traffic lights on the way to work in 5th gear - all because you're having brekkie on the go as you were sneezed on by a baby with a mouthful of porridge right before you left the house so you're late because you had to get changed.

Or maybe you don't get changed - you know you're a mum when you find baby sick on your top at the end of a day spent out with friends, maybe even a mini-shreddie in your cleavage when you get ready for bed at the end of a long day.

I also find myself singing a LOT of the time - usually high pitched twaddle, sometimes something a little more structure like 'wind the bobbin up' which is a personal favourite for grace and me as well as a few other mummy's I know.

Having the washing machine on what seems to be all day every day is another classic. How on earth did we function on two loads a week before the arrival of such a small (yet well dressed) bundle? The electric bill has shot up. To counteract this we are using the rotary drier out in the garden instead of the tumble drier - and playing the hokey cokey with the wet weather (you put the washing out, bring the washing in, out in out in etc etc you get the picture) - apparently this dance with Mother Nature is another symptom of Motherhood.

Forgetting to change out of your slippers when you leave the house, presumably because your mind is on other things, probably whether or not you have remembered SPF 50 sun cream for the baby and whether the green or the yellow sun hat goes best with her outfit today. (By the way, the slippers were comfy so I didn't notice until I got half way across the car park at Asda - not cool).

Loving somebody more then your husband and everyone finding that totally normal...

Apparently you know you're a mum when you find children's toys in the toilet! As Grace is still connected to the earth by a string on her bottom we have yet to experience this, but I remember my sister once telling me a tale of coming upstairs to find her little boy shrieking with joy as he emptied every single last tampon into the toilet.

And of course, giving a running commentary of your every move - let's cross the road Grace, look at the yellow lorry Grace, shall we pay for the shopping Grace, where do we put the shoes Grace - you get the picture!

Some favourites from friends of mine include:

Getting through a 12 hour day on 2 hours sleep
Your family no longer ask how you are - it's all about the grandchild
You realise there is no difference between a weekday or the weekends any more as the alarm goes off at the same time every day!
A hot cup of tea or coffee starts to eclipse a glass of vino as the beverage of choice!
You no longer have privacy when you need to take a shower or go to the loo.
You're up so early with your little one that you can get the housework and two loads of laundry washed and put away before you go to work.
Emptying toys from your handbag to get to your purse.

And I think my personal favourite - never having a dull moment - Grace is constantly giving me food for thought in a way that nothing ever has done in my life before. Love her to the moon and back.

Any to add??


  1. Wait!! I have more.

    1) Being selfless. Everything for me is way down on the priority list.
    2) Having a constant supply of clothes, toys and equipment to buy, sell or pass onto charity. This brings me nicely onto another -
    3) Having a spare room that looks very much like an indoor cat boot sale.

    If I get any more I'll let you know :0)

  2. The fascination with tampons was that he had unwrapped them all and was watching them expand! The other thing he did with the tampons (probably after supplies had been replenished) was unwrap them all and hang them on the bathroom door handle. Dozens of them. I think he had a partner in crime though. Looking back on it was hilarious, but I was a teenager at the time and mortified at what they'd done! M x

  3. So funny - now that I think about it, I also remember them soaping the bath, turning on the shower and trying to surf/water ski on the slippery soaped up surface!